Part 3: Finding The Buried Gems

Winning exactly the best clients isn’t all that hard when you know the flow.

But before I share it with you, keep this in mind: these are real humans with real stories that we’re talking about. I love the gapingvoid illustration that reminds us that if we’ve got a solution, we must understand and become part of their narrative.


1. the ability to effectively identify your clients GOALS and FRICTION

2. the ability to effectively articulate meaningful VALUE

3. the ability to effectively create the right VALUE STREAMS

Pretty straightforward, right?

Each part of this flow comes with nuances that will make or break your odds of getting hired.

So to change your sales game forevs, you need to know about each part of the flow — so let’s delve a little deeper…


It’s usually not very difficult to get a potential client to share their goals — or spill the beans about their problems pretty readily.

Because, hey, they wouldn’t bother talking with you otherwise, would they?

It’s also easy (and common) to keep the conversation at the surface.

But there are some critical subtleties that you’ll miss if you’re not willing to deepen the relationship.

And this is why most business owners fail miserably. So you’ll want to pay attention to this next part…

I call this “Finding The Buried Gems.”

You’ve already heard the surface-y, niceties. You know, the stuff they’d tell any old schmo while they wait for the B train at the Bryant Park station on a weekend.

But The Buried Gems, on the other hand, require deeper digging.

You’ll want to search for 2 key things here…

1 – Understand how the problem is impacting other areas of their life and/or business.

Your ability to effectively and respectfully draw out the havoc their challenges are wreaking separates the pros from the rookies. This includes those feeeeeeelings we talked about earlier.

2 – Get a handle on their deeper motivation that will drive them to actually DO something about their situation.

[——— SETH GODIN might refer to this as empathy ———]

That noise in our head is selfish, afraid and angry. That noise is self-satisfied, self-important and certain. That noise pushes intimacy away and will do anything it can to degrade those that might challenge us.

But, against all odds, empathy is possible.

It’s possible to amplify those too-quiet signals that others send us and to practice imagining, even for a moment, what it might be like to have their noise instead of our noise.

If we put in the effort and devote the time to practice this skill, we can get better at it. We merely have to begin.

Link to full article.

[—————————— SETH GODIN —————————]


That’s how you get a full picture of WHY this is so damn important to the prospect you’re chatting with.

And this is when my skin gets excited because I start seeing even bigger possibilities!

Haha. Sounds crazy, but it’s true.


There are two more nuances here that I want you to pay attention to…

1 – When you make your recommendation, STAY FAR AWAY from the “how we work together” drill — because all they’ll hear is “blah blah blah blah blah…”

That’s where the rookies hang out.

Although it feels safe and familiar, this is not how you want to kick off explaining what is sure to be a life changing experience for them.


2 – Instead, focus on how life will be on the other side of working together.

This is where we left off with that list of benefits earlier. And be sure to tie it into their motives.

Remember this example?

I help you get back to pursuing your bucket list of adventures by eliminating your chronic pain.”

Sure, you’re eliminating chronic pain (generic).

So do thousands of other providers.

But YOU make it meaningful when you tie it into their motivation — which speaks to the value they place on adventure.

And you can take it even further if you know your prospect wants to base jump, for example…

“I help you get back to pursuing your bucket list of adventures — like base jumping and climbing Mt. Kili — by eliminating your chronic pain.”

When you put forth a little bit of extra effort to really, truly understand, articulate and own your value to your clients — you set yourself apart from 95.37% of service providers out there who offer a similar service. 

Skip this step, and they’ll keep looking for someone who does a better job of painting the picture for them.

The caveat to ALL of this advice is that you can only say it if it’s true.

Got it? Promise? Good.

In the final part of this miniseries, we’ll talk about how designing your value streams (aka business model) leads to an “effortless yes” as the final element of this flow.

Oh! And I’ll also share a way for you to get complimentary access to my 3-pronged approach for understanding, articulating and owning your value.

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