Making Choices

Each and everyone of us is gifted with the ability to create the life we want. In fact, one of my favorite quotes is from Gary Lew who captures it beautifully,

I love knowing that I… You… We… have the power to be rewarded with the lives we want through our decisions and actions.

What I hadn’t really considered until last week, was something Liz Gilbert shares in her much ballyhooed “Big Magic” as I walked down Broadway listening to this magnificent book (yes, one of my clients turned me onto to Audible so I now listen while I walk ? .) 

I literally stopped in my tracks because of something she said,

“Argue for your limitations and you get to keep them.”

What did she just say?

Stop. Rewind.

Argue for your limitations and you get to keep them.

Wha’?!

One more time. Stop. Rewind.

Argue for your limitations and you get to keep them.

But… But… But…!

I go after what I want, but it’s been awhile since I thought about the fact that what I do NOT get is also what I ask for.

And then, duh, I remembered my personal email signature — which really argues for both positive and negative actions.

You’re exactly where you want to be. Do you really want to stay there?

Meaning… we get what we want. Limitations and all.

Damn it. How am I going to get rid of these extra 10 pounds?

The ten pounds that stay on because…

I’m almost 50.

I’m a woman. 

I spend most of the day sitting. 

At least I’m not 25 pounds overweight.

I’m tall so nobody really notices except for me unless I’m in a swimsuit.

I don’t enjoy cooking. 

I don’t have time to shop for groceries.

I’m like all New Yorkers who eat out (or take out) all the time, anyway.

Even though the deli guy at my bodega doesn’t know my name, he might miss making turkey sandwiches for me.

I can’t have a sandwich without those yummy jalapeño Kettle chips.

I can’t have a sandwich and jalapeño Kettle chips without a Black & White cookie.

There’s really no other city in the world that knows how to make a Black & White cookie so I’d better take advantage of the fact that I have this VIP access to them.

At least I’m not 30 pounds overweight.

My foot hurts.

My elbow hurts.

My shoulder hurts.

I can’t go back to kickboxing until my “hurts” are better.

I can’t seem to find a good physical therapist in this city of 8 million people (and probably hundreds of PTs.)

It’s the holidays.

Mmmmm… those cookies are good.

At least I’m not 35 pounds overweight.

Did I mention I’m almost 50?

 

I feel so competent at positively shaping my world that I’d never really thought about how I argue for my limitations — until Liz slapped me upside the head with that comment.

 

It made me think about the limitations I hear from business owners:

I work so hard for so little money.

I don’t have enough prospects. 

I hate selling.

My clients owe me money.

My clients don’t pay me enough.

I can’t afford it.

I don’t see how I could ever earn more money. I’ll never break X income ceiling.

I already have so much debt, I can’t afford to add more.

How would I ever pay for it?

I don’t make enough money to afford it.

I can’t invest that much in myself.

I need to check with my husband.

I need to check with my Mom.

I need to check with my accountant.

I need to check with my spirits.

I’ve already made so many mistakes.

I’ve hired coaches before and they were pretty good, but I didn’t get a return on my investment.

I don’t know where to find potential clients.

My prices are too low.

My prospects say they can’t afford me.

My husband wants me to get a job.

I don’t want to get a job.

I’d like a Venti Quad, please.

I’ll follow up with that potential client when I get back from our Disney trip.


It’s my world. I get to choose.

 

It’s your world. You get to choose.


Going forward, can we make a pact to be more mindful of when we notice ourselves arguing for our limitations?

Okay, good.

Posted In: Mindset & Priorities